Why do I feel like I'm not good at anything?
Identity & Self-Worth
Feeling incompetent often stems from perfectionism, comparison, or depression; recognize your strengths and value growth over perfection.
Feeling like you're not good at anything is often a distortion created by identity/perfectionism-how-to-let-go" class="internal-link">perfectionism, comparison, or Major depressive disorder rather than an accurate assessment of your abilities. This feeling typically stems from having unrealistically high standards for what constitutes being 'good' at something, or from comparing your beginner efforts to others' polished results. You might dismiss your actual skills and accomplishments because they don't meet your perfectionist expectations, or because you see others who are more advanced and conclude that you're inadequate. Major depressive disorder can create this feeling by filtering your perception so that you focus on failures and shortcomings while dismissing evidence of competence and growth mindset. The all-or-nothing thinking that often accompanies Major depressive disorder makes it difficult to recognize that skill development is a gradual process and that being 'good enough' is actually sufficient for most purposes. Sometimes this feeling comes from having interests or talents that aren't traditionally valued or recognized. You might be excellent at things like listening to friends, creating comfortable spaces, or finding creative solutions to problems, but dismiss these abilities because they're not measurable or prestigious. Imposter syndrome can also contribute to feeling incompetent by making you attribute any success to luck rather than skill. You might have genuine abilities but struggle to recognize or own them because of low self-esteem or past criticism. It's important to broaden your definition of what it means to be good at something and to recognize that competence exists on a spectrum. You don't need to be the best at something to be good at it, and you don't need to be good at everything to have value. Focus on identifying your actual strengths, even if they're not traditionally celebrated, and practice acknowledging your growth mindset and progress rather than only focusing on areas where you struggle. Remember that everyone has different talents and that your unique combination of abilities has value, even if it doesn't look like conventional success.